Key Points
- Avoid translation fails: Brand names like “Silver Mist” and “Pinto” flopped internationally due to embarrassing meanings in other languages.
- Watch for legal restrictions: Terms like “bank,” “university,” and “doctor” are legally protected and require proper credentials to use.
- Edgy names can work – if done right: “Big Ass Fans” succeeded by proving secondary meaning and using humor without crossing legal lines.
- Aim for memorable, not offensive: The best business names balance creativity and clarity without alienating or confusing your audience.
International Naming Fails to Avoid
Let’s talk about business naming disasters. We’ve all seen them – those cringe-worthy company names that make you wonder, “What were they thinking?” Mike Carr’s podcast “Naughty Naming” digs into this exact problem, sharing some real head-scratchers from major companies who should have known better.
And poor Rolls-Royce thought they were being fancy with their “Silver Mist” model – until German speakers started snickering. Turns out “mist” means “manure” in German. Oops.
Coca-Cola wasn’t immune either. Their first Chinese translation sounded something like “tadpoles and wax” in Mandarin. Not exactly making people thirsty, was it?
Ford’s Pinto ran into trouble in Brazil, where the name resembled slang for male genitalia. And even McDonald’s stumbled when their “Big Mac” was understood as slang for “big breast” in parts of Canada. Awkward!
Legally Restricted Business Name Terms
Beyond these embarrassing translation fails, there are words you legally can’t use in your business name unless you meet specific requirements. This isn’t just about avoiding red faces – it’s about staying on the right side of the law.
Financial & Educational Terms
Ever notice how not just anyone can call themselves a “bank” or “trust”? That’s because these words have specific legal definitions. Unless your business actually operates as a financial trust, with all the regulatory requirements that entails, you simply can’t use “trust” in your name.
The same goes for educational terms. Thinking of starting the “International Business University” from your garage? Think again. Terms like “university” and “college” require actual accreditation in most states. Without it, you’re not just being ambitious – you might be breaking the law.
Professional Designations
Professional titles are another minefield. You can’t just throw “doctor” or “physician” into your company name unless you actually have licensed medical professionals on staff. The same goes for “mechanical engineer” and other certified professions.
Interestingly, Mike points out that newer professional titles without established certification processes are fair game. For example, you could call yourself an “AI prompt engineer” since there’s no formal licensing for that (yet). But try calling yourself a “mechanical engineer” without proper credentials, and you’ll be hearing from regulators faster than you can say “cease and desist.”
Finding the Balance: How Edgy Can You Go?
So how far can you push the envelope? Mike shares the fascinating case of “Big Ass Fans” – yes, that’s a real company, and yes, they managed to get federal trademark approval despite rules against registering obscenities.
Their clever approach? First, they pointed out that “ass” is in the dictionary as a term for a donkey (think: jackass). Second, they argued they were using “Big Ass” simply as a straightforward description for their really large fans – not trying to be vulgar.
They also established what lawyers call “secondary meaning” by successfully using the name in the marketplace before applying for the trademark. Customers knew them, bought from them, and weren’t clutching their pearls in horror. And when they finally applied for the trademark, nobody objected – sealing the deal.
Strategic Naming Recommendations
When it comes to naming your own business, Mike offers some practical wisdom:
Don’t Play It Too Safe
Boring names are forgettable names. If your law firm is “Smith & Jones”, or your accounting practice is “Accurate Accounting”, good luck standing out from the crowd. Safe is forgettable, and forgettable doesn’t bring in customers.
Avoid Truly Offensive Territory
While being edgy can be good, truly offensive names carry huge risks. Beyond the legal headaches, you’ll alienate potential customers and potentially create a PR nightmare. Ask yourself: is the shock value really worth the headache?
Find Your Sweet Spot
The best business names live in that magic middle ground – clever enough to spark conversation, but not so outrageous they spark a backlash. Think playful rather than provocative. You want raised eyebrows and smiles, not angry tweets and boycotts.
Conclusion
Picking the right business name is like walking a tightrope. Lean too far toward boring, and nobody remembers you. Lean too far toward offensive, and everybody remembers you for the wrong reasons.
Do your homework. Check for legal restrictions in your industry. Run potential names by people from different backgrounds to catch cultural missteps. Think about how your name might translate if you expand internationally.
Remember Mike’s example of a name he thought was brilliant: “Streaker” for a fast computer chip. In his mind, it perfectly captured speed. But for many people, it conjures images of naked people running across sports fields – probably not the association a tech company wants!
The perfect business name makes people take notice without taking offense. It’s memorable for the right reasons and steers clear of both legal pitfalls and cultural faux pas. Find that sweet spot, and you’re already miles ahead of the competition – including some very big companies who really should have known better.
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Podcast Transcript
Mike Carr (00:01):
Naughty naming. That’s what we’re going to talk about today. Sounds a little titillating, a little exciting. Well, the original tag, the original descriptor for this session was not nearly as exciting. It was words not allowed in a business name.
That sounds like a real barn burner, right? But naughty naming is a little interesting. So let’s talk a little bit about what you mean by that. Naughty can mean:
(00:32):
Just silly or ridiculous, or you really blew it like the Chevrolet Nova. Nova, in Spanish, meant:
(00:38):
No-go. Why would you name a car ‘No-Go’? Big faux pas.
Rolls-Royce came out with another manufactured car: Silver Mist. Mist, in German, means manure. Oh, you got to be kidding me.
(00:52):
Coca-Cola, when they first went to China, the Mandarin phonetic translation sounded an awful lot like tadpoles and wax. Something like that. Boy, that’s refreshing. I’m going to get a Coke and drink some tadpoles and wax today. Don’t think so. And then we really do move into the naughty, the Pinto, the Ford Pinto name Pinto in Brazil sounds an awful lot like male genitalia. Ooh, you don’t want to go there. Or Big Mac, the McDonald’s Big Mac hamburger in Canada was slang for big breast. Again, not a direction that you want to go. So you need to be very careful about obscenities and vulgarities and translations in another language that just is going to rub folks the wrong way. And that’s probably pretty obvious. But what else should you watch out for? There are certain words that have a legal definition that you really can’t use in your name, like trust we’ve talked about before, building trust in your brand, building trust in your company.
(01:57):
Well, maybe you want to think, well, let’s put trust in the name. Well, you can’t do that. Not because you want to do that anyway, but trust has a legal definition, right? And so unless you are truly a financial trust and fit that definition, it wouldn’t make any sense. There are other names like that, like a university or a college. Maybe you’ve got a group of folks that are incredible artists and you want to teach art to all kinds of people, and then you’ll call yourselves the National American Art University. Well, ‘university’ in a lot of states has to be an accredited institution. You have to meet certain standards to be able to use that in your name. And there are a whole slew of names like that in the financial space. Banks and credit unions, in the medical space doctor and some of the medical degrees, and even in the engineering space.
(02:45):
Let’s talk about AI and engineers, because one of the popular new occupations is an AI prompt engineer. And so you’re pretty good at that, and you’ve got some buddies that are too. And you want to call yourselves ‘The Smart AI Prompt Engineers’. That’s your company name. Can you do that? You actually can. No, you actually can. Why? Because there’s no certification right now for a AI prompt engineer, and you’re using engineers as a descriptive term. But what you probably couldn’t do is call yourselves ‘The Smart AI Mechanical Engineers’, unless you have a mechanical engineer or several on your staff. Why? Because a mechanical engineer is something that has a professional certification and license associated with it. And in a lot of states, you could not use that term in your company name unless you actually had that certification. So just be wary of all those words that are out there that might cause you to bump into some legal issues or legal problems at the federal level or at the state level.
(03:52):
But you can push the edge. So how naughty do you want to be? Do you want to be as naughty as Big Ass Fans? Are you kidding me? Guess what? They were able to register that name as a federal trademark, even though trademark law says you cannot register an obscenity or a vulgarity as a trademark. So how’d they do that? Well, it was an interesting case. Ass is actually in the dictionary as the name for a donkey, as in jackass. So it was an accepted term already in the dictionary. ‘Big ass’, they argued, was used as a descriptor just for a big fan. It wasn’t used in any vulgar or offensive way. It was just a descriptor for a big, big fan. They also used that name in commerce for a while before they tried to register it. And they established what attorneys call secondary meaning; they could show that customers adopted the name, and the marketplace didn’t really have any problems or confusion or pushback with the name Big Ass Fans.
(04:55):
And then finally, when they did file their trademark registration, no one objected. So they were able to sort of go through the back door and get that name registered as a federal trademark. But that was sort of like right on the edge. So how on the edge do you want to go? And you may say, Hey, I know my target. I know my tribe. I know my audience. I know my followers and edgy is okay with them. They’re even okay with something that’s a little bit profane or offensive. Mom and dad wouldn’t have been, but my tribe, my people, my customers, my followers, my audience. They’re fine with that. So here’s what we advise our clients, and this probably is going to make sense to you, but I think it’s just super important. Things that are edgy in a fun, humorous, positive way are great, right?
(05:43):
They make you smile. They might raise a few eyebrows, but more from a chuckle standpoint than, oh my gosh, names that could be viewed as disparaging or offensive or obscene or vulgar. Why the risk? Not just from a legal perspective. You might not be able to register the name because there might be a constituency out there that really pushes back. And before you know it, you’re canceled on social media and everything else. It’s just not worth it. So I have an example name, a million dollar name that I’ve come up with, and I have tried to sell clients for years, and it’s just brilliant and I’m going to give it to you right now for free. It’s all about speed. So we do a lot of work for the chip manufacturers, the chips that are like in your smartphone, your Samsung phone, your iPhone, your Samsung watch, your Mac computer, maybe even your car.
(06:32):
Every time they come out with a new set of chips, they got to be faster, especially with AI and all the video processing and everything. Speed is what it’s all about, baby. Speed, speed, speed. Here is the name. Little edgy, little controversial, but it screams speed. Are you ready for it? Streaker! Streaker, baby. That’s it. Brilliant. Two syllables. Easy to say, easy to spell, and conjures up speed. Million dollar name to you right now for free. Maybe not so brilliant. Why not? Well, in doing research, which we do a lot of, ‘streak’ for some folks is really dated. Like that’s what my mom and dad used to do, maybe, or at least talked about. But my generation, not so cool. Or if you’re a chip manufacturer, do I really want my new hot, cool line of graphic processing chips to be associated with a bunch of folks running around on a soccer field naked, or a baseball field, or football field, whatever it might be?
(07:36):
So maybe streaker isn’t as brilliant as I thought it was, but going forward, the advice that we have for you is avoid the boring. Avoid the familiar, avoid the safe. Because the safe is just a yawner. Nobody cares about a safe name, but avoid the too controversial, the names that are offensive to many, and just try to find that sweet spot where it’s a little edgy, it’s fun, it raises a few eyebrows, but in a playful, positive way. It generates some conversation because it is witty, it does have that sense of humor. It’s not so straight laced and buttoned down that nobody wants to talk about it. If you get headed in that direction, we think you’ll be headed in the right direction.
